Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in xilium's LiveJournal:

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Wednesday, June 2nd, 2004
9:57 pm	today was the last day liz is here before she leaves on her trip to new york...we spent the whole day together and it was great...but now she's gone and i feel bad....and i know i'm being a little baby, i mean it's not even a long time really but still....god i miss her already..... (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, May 26th, 2004
12:56 pm	My war thread is so kick ass, this is even more interesting than the Bazaar War. Thanks to everyone that's making this thread worth being in. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 25th, 2004
9:52 pm	me and liz's seventh month anniversery......it was fun but some things didn't go to well.... got up about 8, talked to a few people online waiting for her to get up, and then she picked me up at 9:30 or so. Went to her house to hang out for a bit, and then left to go to her piano lesson for that day. It wasn't that well for her i guess, she didn't know her piece and she always has to be perfect at what she does so she got a bit down, but it wasn't to awful bad. We ate at Pizza hut, then came back to her house... She couldn't find anything to wear, i guess she has gained a little weight from her shot and though i think that she is fine, as beautiful as ever, she was very sad she couldn't find the perfect thing and cried, which was the same thing that happened our last anniversery. It took over an hour to get her moving and going, and with a little comforting i got her out of the house. We went to the mall, i bought her all her birthday gifts ((which was a matching purse and wallet she wanted and some manga she liked, only about 100 dollars all together, not to much...i would have liked to spend more on her...)) Then we played a little DDR. I got a bit mad failing a song i know and sort of punched the machine...and well it scared her. I can understand i guess, i have a temper with things like that, i've never had a temper with her but with games or something similar i'm known to get angry. So i made her cry there, and i felt really bad, it took a while to make her feel better ((I promised never to get angry like that again, which is hard but i always do what i promise so yea...)) Next we were going to see a movie but didn't because i couldn't see anything worth watching, so we went to the pet store which cheered her up a bit, and then went to eat at olive garden. Nice dinner, everything was great, and then i told her i had things i needed to do tonight so i would have to go home. So she drove me back...but when she got back she cried cause i hadn't gone with her to the beach ((i asked her out at the beach, she likes to go there the 25th of every month)) well, i said lets go then, no reason to cry about it, we would just go now and then it would be better. But she said she didn't feel like driving there now, and cried about that. I was confused for a bit, and in the end she cried as i left, even though i spent over an hour outside my house comforting her and telling her everything was fine.... yep, i'm confused an in a way feel i did something wrong..... (Comment on this)
Thursday, May 13th, 2004
11:54 pm	kool people i know as of now (in order) 1. Liz 2. Megan 3. Tyler 4. Jess 5. Ron 6. Charlie 7. Jake 8. Alex 9. Joey 10. Tyler again ((cause he's teh sex)) (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, May 8th, 2004
9:40 am	what the hell, DM is getting on my nerves, what kind of guy calls me fudgepacker first thing of Im then log's off, that is dumb ass kid shit. Yea we lost the LCC, but looking at the scores we didn't do half bad, especially since my scores were almost even with Wolftrappe's. Just a fucking game, get over it. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, April 25th, 2004
10:41 pm	RE Outbreak = teh sex Enough said. (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 15th, 2004
11:01 pm	PrincessClover01: i'm sorry you're sad darling.. i hope you're better tommorrow... i'll write you... and you can read it later k? ((tho, i don't know how long it'll be...))........................................ oh... honey.. i have something to tell you.. ((it just kinda happened...)) i didn't want to tell you cuz you seem sad... but it really... just hurts me, makes me sad and angry... i feel exposed, and just.. i don't know.. like i'm dirty.... ((even tho i know that i am not)) i don't want you to be more sad.. but i don't know what to think or anythinng.. it kinda scares me... EpochHp: whoa, what happened? PrincessClover01: well.. brandon.. ((you know .. my last bf)).. he just started talking to me.. and i was like "okay.. that's fine.. be friendly"... and all.. and then there was this pause and he was like..... PrincessClover01: BadMan389 (10:13:01 PM): anywho BadMan389 (10:13:15 PM): the reason why ive been talking to ya, is because ive been hearing some shit BadMan389 (10:13:21 PM): and im not liking it PrincessClover01 (10:14:09 PM): *blink blink*.. like what? PrincessClover01: BadMan389 (10:14:19 PM): and my source, is a complete family friend, and him lying, is pretty harsh PrincessClover01 (10:14:40 PM): *taken aback*.. what do you mean? PrincessClover01: BadMan389 (10:15:02 PM): i heard you fucked 4 guys EpochHp: ............ PrincessClover01: PrincessClover01 (10:15:28 PM): OMG!!?!?!?!?!!!!?????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what in the freaking world???????.. who told you that?!!?!?!?!?!??!! PrincessClover01 (10:15:46 PM): what did i become? a hoe or something in the past 6 months??? PrincessClover01 (10:15:57 PM): that's horrrible!!!!!!... PrincessClover01: BadMan389 (10:16:27 PM): it is BadMan389 (10:16:32 PM): and i know you too well for that BadMan389 (10:16:46 PM): and that you and kelley hated each other PrincessClover01: BadMan389 (10:17:45 PM): im not gonna say the source BadMan389 (10:18:00 PM): because then again...he may have heard it from someone else? BadMan389 (10:18:06 PM): and thats just propoganda PrincessClover01: BadMan389 (10:18:18 PM): so as long as you say that its not true BadMan389 (10:18:23 PM): i believe you EpochHp: tell him to fuck off, he's trying to start shit *angry* PrincessClover01: PrincessClover01 (10:18:26 PM): and completely untrue.. ((at least the 4 guy thing))... to tell the truth ... i'm on a birth control shot..... and have made love with my bf ((i say it that way, b/c it's a special thing between us.... not just to 'get off'...)) ........ i have done nothing else with ANYONE else... that's completely GAH!!!!... ((well, your source is apparently not a good one.. not catching much of the truth... uggggggg)).... and me and kelly are good... we've never been the BEST of buds, but we talk all the time!!... PrincessClover01: BadMan389 (10:19:09 PM): so he is partially true BadMan389 (10:19:21 PM): he also said you have gone completly nympho BadMan389 (10:19:29 PM): at least i think thats how you spell it... PrincessClover01: rincessClover01 (10:21:18 PM): yeah... but only andrew... and b/c i love him; and he's even moving to NYC with me after senior year............... *scoffs*.. no way.. sure i like to do it ((who honestly doesn't?)).... but actually, i don't all the time b/c i don't want it to become "common" or just "sex"... i always want it to be special and loving.....he feels the same way and yeah... i can say that we truthfully cuddle more then doing anything sexual!.... i don't think that is quite the same as what your 'source' is telling ya... PrincessClover01: BadMan389 (10:21:55 PM): oh BadMan389 (10:21:57 PM): alright BadMan389 (10:22:04 PM): i dont meen to intrude on your love life BadMan389 (10:22:08 PM): i even promised you i wouldnt PrincessClover01: BadMan389 (10:22:14 PM): but i thought it was kinda serious BadMan389 (10:22:18 PM): and hell... BadMan389 (10:22:28 PM): who ever said i still didnt watch your back? PrincessClover01: PrincessClover01 (10:22:31 PM): well.. that's about it..... i guess all i have to say is that your source needs to talk to ME.. .... i'm gald you talked to me tho... instead of just believing it all... PrincessClover01 (10:22:59 PM): *smiles*.. thanx .... that really makes me feel bad that some one and others may think that about me... :-( ..... but thanx.. for telling me.. I'm PISSED. Who the fuck this little bastard think he is, trying to start shit with me and liz. It's him, he's her old boyfriend and how he's trying to get in me and her way, no i'm going to teach this kid a lesson he'll never forget, no one talks like that about her, they can say whatever the fuck they want about me but i won't let something like this go, tommorrow is the D-day for this shit. Look what it did to her ".. i guess.. when i read it, and when he left and i thought about it for a little..... i just felt like eyes were watching me all over; like someone has been judging and watching my every move; like i'm both exposed in such a horrid light and yet seperated cuz i feel like someone that i may talk to thinks so horribly of me... i'm still feeling a little scared... i feel like.. i don't know.. like what if people do think that? *sighs*... it just really really really shook me up inside... my heart wretched that our lovely relationship could be twisted so badly....." Oh this is so going to bother her for a long time, and i know that i'm going to have to deal with it. (Comment on this)
Friday, April 9th, 2004
11:22 pm	ten hours of work and althanas is down, damn it all to hell. Current Mood: annoyed (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 7th, 2004
10:56 pm	Mike and thor vs. me and DM How the hell do i get what i think to be the best team in the first round. Damn it, we had better win or i'm going to fucking be pissed, this is the second tourey i've ended up being screwed in the first round. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, April 5th, 2004
10:29 pm	I'm tired, but reading these Love Hina books are kick ass. I robbed ((yes, i am a fucking theif, you can take your morals and shove them)) the next 4, which leaves my manga collection at about 20 stolen mangas. Lol, if i can keep this up i'll be rolling in all sorts of series ((or winding up in jail, one of the two)) (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, April 4th, 2004
10:32 pm	Did you know that it's possible to be downright depressed yet act like you aren't all the time. It's true, you can feel like just finishing yourself off while laughing, you can want to be alone while in the presense of the one you love the most. It's not hard to do actually, easier than you think. Only really hurts when you ARE alone, that's when it really gets to you. Yet you don't care, you still can't look into your girlfriends eyes. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
11:54 am	Life is so Fucking annoying!!!! Got in a car crash, fucking old people slammed in to the back of me and liz at like 40 miles per hour. Fucked up car, so now new one is needed. Sucks cause now i can't see liz until it gets fixed, so i'm stuck doing shit around here. At least no one was hurt, though the old guy in the passenger seat of the other car went into shock and had to be taken away. >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_< >_ (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, April 1st, 2004
10:58 pm	I'm tired.....and liz is talking to me.....and something seems wrong again....and i feel like going and jumping off a bridge right now.....*sighs*...... (Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 31st, 2004
10:18 pm	omg, Magus just named out team the Dark Crusaders for the LCC, what the fuck!!!! (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 30th, 2004
9:42 pm	Let's see, what has happened. I'm getting behind in althanas, I have two threads to post in and I really just can't do it, nothing seems good right now in my writing. Ed is a kick ass writer, the thread he wrote is so kick ass I'm trying to pull myself together to post in it. Hopefully I'll get it together enough to post soon. I feel like crap right now, damn headache makes it feel like a bomb is going off inside my brain. It hurts so bad it makes me sick to my stomach. Damn it, the only reason i'm online is cause i can't lay down without almost throwing up. I can't see liz for a while now, to many things that the both of us have to do. I need another job since i lost my last one, so i have to search around. If all else fails i'll have to get two jobs at *ugh* fast food places. Need money though, living costs the green. You ever want to tell someone you want to do something even though it would be bothersome to them. I really just want to ask liz to drop everything so we can see each other, but i know i shouldn't. Damn it..... (Comment on this)
Friday, March 19th, 2004
12:21 pm	I got fired last night...joy......so now i have to go job hunting in hopes i can't get another job to keep myself a float in the world. Oh, and someone comment dammit, i feel unloved. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 16th, 2004
9:02 pm	Beach and mall, beach and mall....that has been my entire week so far, and it will be what i do until the end of Spring Break. Then back to good old class's, and exams that are coming up soon enough. Medical stuff sucks..... (Comment on this)
Friday, March 5th, 2004
11:46 pm	Worked......so...many....hours....going....to....sleep.... (Comment on this)
Thursday, March 4th, 2004
9:39 pm	.....God...hates...me...... I'm sure it's no big surprise to you that your romance is The Princess Bride. A heartwarming tale of "Twue Wuve" that has giants, Spainards and swashbuckling. You really do think that love can overcome anything. You may be a touch naive but your heart is certainly in the right place. You've probably got one of those relationships where proper nouns have been replaced with "Snookums" and "Pookie Pie". Eww. Beware a cuteness overload. What Romance Movie Best Represents Your Love Life? brought to you by Quizilla (Comment on this)
9:34 pm	Red: Aren't you the romantic? Life is poetic. If you don't already, write poetry, you're good at it. What color do you see the world in? brought to you by Quizilla (Comment on this)